Christ Almighty, The Clueless Customers Come From A Centralized Location!

OPERATION VIBRATION BRINGS JOY OF SEX TO IRAQI WOMEN

EDISON, NJ- Deirdre Krasner, owner of Playtime in Edison NJ, wants to help the women of Iraq feel good about themselves. Really good. To accomplish this goal Deirdre Krasner and her staff are taking matters into their own hands by helping the women of Iraq take matters into their own hands. What's Deirdre Krasner 's plan? She's sending vibrators to Iraq.
Three dozen fully functional vibrators. "The women of Iraq have been aggrieved for a very long time," said Deirdre Krasner, "now that the US has liberated them I'd like to help them come to enjoy the sensual side of themselves that has been so viciously oppressed for so long". Operation Vibration was funded by Deirdre Krasner, the staff of Playtime, and Playtime customers.

Nick Smerecki, General Manager, points proudly to his I SUPPORT OPERATION VIBRATION button and says "This really means something to me. Too often the human need for sensuality is overlooked. These women have been subjugated and treated so poorly for so long. They desperately need to embrace their sensuality. I'm proud to be a part of that".

Merchandise Manager Mike Drake chuckles while telling of the confusion Operation Vibration initially generated, "Some people thought we were going to send used vibrators. One local sorority actually brought several into the store to donate. I explained that we would be sending new, unused vibrators and the girls were a bit embarrassed but in the end they laughed and donated a few dollars to the cause. We've really selected some fabulous vibrators for this, I think the Iraqi women will be most pleased, that's over $2,000.00 worth of vibrators we're sending!".

"So far everyone has been very supportive" says Operations Manager Twyla Logan, "originally we wanted to send a separate shipment of vibrators to US servicewomen stationed in Iraq as well but several government officials pointed to the resistance to Operation Playboy and said since the "any serviceperson" program had also been suspended they would not support or encourage such a donation. That's why we are sending the vibrators to the women of Iraq only and not soldiers as well".

The entire Playtime staff gathered Monday (9/29/03) morning to pack the vibrators and many staff members also included personal notes containing words of encouragement to the women of Iraq. The box is expected to reach Iraq in several weeks.

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As far as the main point of the article goes, well, I uh, I think her heart is in the right place, I guess.

But I don't think this is a very good idea.

First of all, as far as women's rights go, Iraq was one of the most secularized of countries, with women holding down jobs and wearing pretty much what they wanted.

Second, what's going to happen if religious fundamentalism sweeps in because of the civil unrest the U.S.'s occupation has caused and some women are found with vibrators?

Third, the government's policies don't reflect the attitudes of the people, and don't necessarily reflect attitudes held within the privacy of their own homes.

Fourth, wouldn't it be a better idea to focus on getting women represented in the newly forming government first? If women have strong representation, they can order their own vibrators over the internet. It's not like they don't know they exist.

Fifth, I think this is maybe just somebody wanting a creative press release to get more sales rather than someone who has a dream to give a vibe to every Iraqi woman with a functioning clitoris.

But it was nice for me to discover that all my irritating female customers who try to return year-old used vibrators are coming from one centralized location. If I could just find out which sorority, which college, I could take steps to eliminate this problem for sex toy store owners everywhere. Now that would be a public service!